Write a number in the blank at the left of each statement below, based on this scale:
To what DEGREE is each of the statements LIKE or UNLIKE your family?
Very much UNLIKE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Very much LIKE my family
Enter one NUMBER in the blank to the left of each statement. Make certain you use LOW numbers to describe statements which are unlike your family, and HIGH numbers to describe statements like your family.
_____1) There are quite a few things we just don't talk about in our family.
_____2) Our family takes a long time to adjust when problems or big changes happen.
_____3) Arguments sometimes happen for no good reason in our family.
_____4) When someone in our family gets angry, it seems to last for a long time.
_____5) It's sometimes hard to solve family disagreements because no one will compromise.
_____6) Our family might be better off if alcohol was used more wisely.
_____7) When it comes to family leisure time, it's hard to find something that everyone wants to do together.
_____8) Tempers can flare up easily in our family.
_____9) Sometimes in our family, people may agree to something and then act like they don't really mean it.
____10) When we have family arguments, it seems somebody tries to win in an all-or-nothing way.
____11) People take a long time to get over fights or disagreements in our family.
____12) Quite often the child(ren) in my family seem to have more influence over what happens than their parent(s).
____13) My child(ren) don't show me (or my spouse) the proper amount of respect.
____14) In our family, there are a lot of strict rules about how things should be done.
____15) My child(ren) often take advantage when you try to be easy-going with them.
____16) People in our family don't seem to do their share of the household chores without a lot of reminders.
____17) We don't openly show appreciation for each other very often in our family.
____18) Before you know it, a small disagreement can become blown out of proportion in our family.
____19) Sometimes people in our family listen to, but don't really hear, what another family member is trying to say.
____20) Sometimes in our family, talking about a problem just seems to make it worse.
____21) If we tried harder to understand each other, we could be happier in our family.
____22) It's sometimes hard to know what other family members are thinking or feeling about important family issues.
____23) Sometimes when we reach a family decision, we end up making a decision that nobody supports very much.
____24) People's nerves get on edge in our family for no good reason.
If your family is in the "cool" zone, then your family is showing fewer signs of stress than most. Build on your strengths(items where you scored 1-3), and if there is an item where you scored 5 or above, try to think of one or two things that you could do to improve your family score.WARM ZONE (73-108)
If your family is in the "warm" zone, then your family is just about as stressful as the average Canadian family. Some stress in inevitable and you should not be overly concerned. Instead, build on your strengths(items where you scored 1-3). Also, choose one item where you scored 5 or above and try to think of one or two things that you could do to improve your family score.HOT ZONE(109-240)
If your family is in the "hot" zone, then your family is showing more signs of stress than the typical Canadian family. If your score is "hot" now-but would usually be less high-focus on getting back to the "cooler" times as soon as possible. Build on the strengths your family has, and see what you can practically do to reduce one or two of your family's higher scoring items.